Integrating the Self: 3 steps to integrate our desire and social expectation

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Lately we’ve been understanding that is necessary to set boundaries, from our true necessities, so we can relate to people in a more constructive way in order to integrate ourselves to connect to who we really are.

But, why focusing so much on integration instead of positivity?, it is simple, if we want the world to change we have to acknowledge other points of you, it’s all about personal decisions. During the last few years, I’ve been strengthening my believe that we are all one, is like being part of a body where each one of us has a certain role and, by integrating it to the other roles of the whole system, we potentiate it.

Can we imagine our brains working only for, and by, themselves, independent from the rest of our bodies? When we think about that we can perceive the importance of integrating even more to others. For example, the more we integrate nutrition, physical activity, presence (meditation in everything we do), breathing, learning, mental activity and feelings, in an appropriate way, the better our organs work, the more energy we have and the more harmonious way we relate to everyone and everything around us.

And now that we can understand better about integration let’s focus on a very important aspect: Our Self. The Self is the way we recognize ourselves and the way we are aware of our own identity, according to Freud, is the balance of our desires and what society expects from us. Then, if we decide we want to work on our talents, but people think they’re not that profitable, we can create an inner conflict, for we need to choose between what we love and the expectations of others. But, what if we learn to integrate the Self and make it an ally? It’s possible by following these steps, that can be used in any field of our lives:

  1. Identify what we love that is constructive: let’s avoid using tags, we can feel ourselves flowing with many activities in our lives, we can create, from that point, new ways of offering the world what we can give. There is a universe of possibilities in the same field, let’s think and feel differently, by integrating what we love in our jobs and take it to the world. What about being a music teacher who integrates musical composition with their personal experiences? Everything is possible.
  2. Identify what is expected from us: at this point everything depends on the points of view of others, since society itself doesn’t expect the same from everyone of us, in fact we want more and more differentiated or personalized products and services. First of all, it is necessary to identify with whom we want to connect in our lives, and, from that point, understand what that group of consciousness expect from a work like ours.
  3. Integrate two visions with purpose and in a prosper way: since we already know what we want, and what the specific group expects, we can build our own way of prospering in society, with a purpose. Feeling what we do with our hearts (that makes us enjoy life) and materialize everything with the mind (that connects us to material reality), is an interesting and constructive integration, another point of view.

Let’s teach our Self that there are other points of view, so we can integrate it as a vital part of our personal development and expand our personal connection. I choose living from the point of view of “survival of the wisest”. What about you? What point of view do you choose?


Version en español

versão em portugues

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